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[Fic] Naruto: Sakura + Sasuke/Naruto: Anywhere But Here
Title: Anywhere But Here
Summary: Sakura doesn't make ANBU, and wants to talk to Naruto. About Feelings. But sorry fangirls, Sasuke and Naruto are never gonna spout poetry about it. Plot What Plot. 300 words.
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Originally I posted it into sasuxnaru, but it grew on me (and got like, a ton of comments, which always make me go ":DDDD") and I moved the post here so it'll be with me always. <3 I'm weird. I bond with my fics. *headslap*
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“Did YOU make it into ANBU?” She hissed.
Naruto swallowed, refusing to say anything, and that said it all.
"Oh God." Sakura wailed. "I'm such a loser! I got disqualified for ANBU because my MOTHER showed up to the disclosed location! Because she read it in my DIARY. I haven't written in it since I was thirteen, I get drunk ONCE and scribble crap and she shows up to cheer me on and--oooohhh I hate my life!"
"It's not so bad Sakura-chan," Naruto tried, as delicately as a rhino in a china shop. He sucked so bad at this...
“Yes it is! I'm a failure with the most embarrassing mother, I can't do anything right, I feel so fat and bloated and I’M ON MY PERIOD AND I HATE EVERYONE!”
”…” Naruto turned and tried to stealthily escape by running away.
“Coward!” She snapped at him, dragging him down by the collar, “Stay here and talk to me like a man!”
“I’d rather go against Pein again thanks,” Naruto whimpered fearfully. And Itachi. And Kyuubi. And Sasuke during a bitch fit when he left the toilet seat up. Anything!
"Don't you and Sasuke-kun talk about your feelings?"
Naruto looked at her weirdly. "No. Never."
Sakura gave him a flat look. "You two are both retards."
"Hello~: he ran off with a man who had neon signs for child rapist; intelligence emotional or otherwise is clearly not what attracts me to him."
"So how does that make you feel...?"
"Oh God!" He clawed at the sand to get away, while Sakura's eyes glinted madly.
"You're not escaping Fox Boy, Ino's away and I want a girl talk NOW."
Naruto whimpered.
"Think of it as Hokage training, distracting me from my pain! Tell me exactly how you and Sasuke-kun feel about each other!"
"Dammit, no! I blow shit up, I walk on water, I bring people back from the dead, I convert sinning bastards, I give cheerleading speeches and file paperwork--WHAT DO YOU PEOPLE WANT FROM ME?!"
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A/N: What happened to Sakura and her mom would totally happen to me. No really. *hides in hands* Ughhhh....
Summary: Sakura doesn't make ANBU, and wants to talk to Naruto. About Feelings. But sorry fangirls, Sasuke and Naruto are never gonna spout poetry about it. Plot What Plot. 300 words.
-----
Originally I posted it into sasuxnaru, but it grew on me (and got like, a ton of comments, which always make me go ":DDDD") and I moved the post here so it'll be with me always. <3 I'm weird. I bond with my fics. *headslap*
-----
“Did YOU make it into ANBU?” She hissed.
Naruto swallowed, refusing to say anything, and that said it all.
"Oh God." Sakura wailed. "I'm such a loser! I got disqualified for ANBU because my MOTHER showed up to the disclosed location! Because she read it in my DIARY. I haven't written in it since I was thirteen, I get drunk ONCE and scribble crap and she shows up to cheer me on and--oooohhh I hate my life!"
"It's not so bad Sakura-chan," Naruto tried, as delicately as a rhino in a china shop. He sucked so bad at this...
“Yes it is! I'm a failure with the most embarrassing mother, I can't do anything right, I feel so fat and bloated and I’M ON MY PERIOD AND I HATE EVERYONE!”
”…” Naruto turned and tried to stealthily escape by running away.
“Coward!” She snapped at him, dragging him down by the collar, “Stay here and talk to me like a man!”
“I’d rather go against Pein again thanks,” Naruto whimpered fearfully. And Itachi. And Kyuubi. And Sasuke during a bitch fit when he left the toilet seat up. Anything!
"Don't you and Sasuke-kun talk about your feelings?"
Naruto looked at her weirdly. "No. Never."
Sakura gave him a flat look. "You two are both retards."
"Hello~: he ran off with a man who had neon signs for child rapist; intelligence emotional or otherwise is clearly not what attracts me to him."
"So how does that make you feel...?"
"Oh God!" He clawed at the sand to get away, while Sakura's eyes glinted madly.
"You're not escaping Fox Boy, Ino's away and I want a girl talk NOW."
Naruto whimpered.
"Think of it as Hokage training, distracting me from my pain! Tell me exactly how you and Sasuke-kun feel about each other!"
"Dammit, no! I blow shit up, I walk on water, I bring people back from the dead, I convert sinning bastards, I give cheerleading speeches and file paperwork--WHAT DO YOU PEOPLE WANT FROM ME?!"
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A/N: What happened to Sakura and her mom would totally happen to me. No really. *hides in hands* Ughhhh....